THE WEBER MOVIE COUNTDOWN

THE GOAL FOR 2018: 200 MOVIES WATCHED BY MIDNIGHT NEW YEAR'S EVE!  (AFTER TOPPING OUT AT 194 in 2017)

CAN HE DO IT?

​​THE WEBER MOVIE COUNTDOWN

GEOSTORM (2017)

I admit it – I am a disaster film junkie.  Already rewatched the Towering Inferno this year.  Last year it was Earthquake and the Poseidon Adventure. So I had to see Geostorm in a theater before it slunked out of multiplexes, geotail between its legs as the advance notice was awful.  But I was determined.  So I dragged my wife and together with a grand total of two other people in the gigantic theater we were in, we viewed Geostorm. And yes – it was a disaster!  First of all the first half of the movie is filled with people (including our lead, Gerald Butler) trying to figure out a mysterious computer ailment that is taking Butler’s life work, a global weather control system called “Dutch Boy,” and making it do very bad things.  Like toss a worker out of a space station.  Or heat up Hong Kong so gas mains explode, trying to kill a scientist who’s onto something.  Watching people type on keyboards isn’t exactly cinematic.  Boring is the word that comes to mind.  And that’s the other problem with Geostorm – it never goes full tilt disaster mode.  When it finally does, the effects are pretty cheesy.  The payoff sucks.  The plot sucks.  Gerald Butler is terribly miscast as Jake the genius.  Jim Sturgess as his brother is unbelievable – oh, he’s also a member of the president’s cabinet, I think.  The idiocy of this plot, which I COULD go on and on about (but I won’t), is like a class in how not to write a script.  You’ll guess the bad guy in nanoseconds – unless you’ve never seen a movie before.  (SPOILER) I sure can’t remember another movie where the Secretary of State (Ed Harris) casually takes a rocket launcher from the trunk of his limo and fires it – he scores a direct hit, BTW.  Truly Geocrap


​TLA'S one word review: geosnore