THE WEBER MOVIE COUNTDOWN

THE GOAL FOR 2018: 200 MOVIES WATCHED BY MIDNIGHT NEW YEAR'S EVE!  (AFTER TOPPING OUT AT 194 in 2017)

CAN HE DO IT?

​​THE WEBER MOVIE COUNTDOWN

#29 A CURE FOR WELLNESS (2017)









Lockhart, a young, ambitious and already corrupt Wall Street type (Dane DeHaan), is dispatched to a mysterious Switzerland sanitarium to bring back his company's CEO so that a merger can be signed off. The CEO wrote letters to all saying he's not coming back. Lockhart gets there and has missed visiting hours by a few minutes. On the way to a hotel, his car service rams a deer and he awakens in the sanitarium with a broken leg. Now he's a patient who is told to "drink plenty of water." Something odd is going on here. Very, very odd. The guests are borderline dotty. And they sure do drink a lot of H20. Here's a hint - Don't drink the local water - eels swim in it (among other things, to paraphrase the old joke). Director Gore Verbinski makes everything look gorgeous - and then dank and industrial when the script calls for it. A Cure for Wellness is way overlong, running a tad under 2 1/2 hours and becomes in essence an old Vincent Price movie as it slogs to a climax. Jason Isaacs does his best to quell the suspicions of our hero as Dr. Vollmer, the director of the sanitarium, who obviously has something to hide. There's a dental torture scene that you won't be able to watch. There's a scene in a pool that may remind you of Carrie. There are eels. People drink water. Oh and did I mention eels? There are two false endings as A Cure for Wellness refuses to end. A very despicable thing ALMOST happens towards the end. There are numerous bizarre images that are never quite explained - style over substance, I suppose. And one weirdly sexual scene comes out of nowhere and can't be explained by Lockhart's delusions - he's locked in a water isolation tank and cannot even SEE what we are supposing that he's imagining. There's a lot going on here but not a lot of is is coherent. Now you'll have to excuse me - I need a glass of water. BOTTLED water.

TLA ONE-WORD REVIEW: SQUIRMY